Happy Father's Day! - Week 41

It's another holiday in a deployed environment. So, what do we do? Run some more! This is the 10th 5k I have run here since Thanksgiving, as well as completing a 10k, a 10 miler, and a 30k ruck march. I have finally gotten to the point where I don't hate running anymore. And I achieved my best time for a 5k which is about 8 minutes faster than the one I did for Thanksgiving!

Father's Day tends to be a day of mixed emotions for me. My parents were divorced when I was four and I only had occasional contact with my father, so I didn't have the closest relationship with him that I would have liked. I am grateful to Sid Speirs, my friend's father, who was the best role model for me to learn what a good husband and father looks like. I try to emulate him often. I also feel conflicted because I don't often feel like the best father. I have my weaknesses too, and often feel annoyed by my children's fighting, arguing, whining, or demanding. So, when Father's Day comes around it reminds me I need to be better. That's not a bad thing, but it does come with a dose of motivational guilt. 

Today, for my last Sunday deployed, I spoke of 1 Samuel 16:7 and how the Lord looks on the heart. I spoke of what we want to keep out of our heart and what to keep in it based on scriptural evidence. More than anything, I have hope that the Lord sees my heart: my righteous desires, motivations, intents, and attempts to be a good father; how I want to raise my children in light and truth, teach them, coach them, and mentor them to become the best possible versions of  themselves. But most of all my desire to love them unconditionally, as our Father in Heaven does for all of us. Perhaps that is one of the greatest blessings of fatherhood, is that it motivates and pushes me to become more like my Father in Heaven. For that I am eternally grateful. When I spend time with my children one-on-one, I love to have fun with them, listen to and talk to them, and my love for them continues to grow.

I remember my Mission President told us 20 years ago that the most important investigators we will ever have are our own children. I have taken that seriously and have taught them the missionary lessons when they were seven years old, and then had them teach the lessons to the family to solidify them. I often think of what kind of example I am to my children, and I often set and reach goals or make sacrifices simply to show them what a disciple of Christ should do. I hope I succeed at pointing them to Christ and teaching them to look to Him instead of me, because I have plenty of weaknesses. But my greatest goal in life, my mission statement, is to serve God and take care of my family (meaning lead them to Him). I take my responsibility to preside, provide, and protect my family seriously, and I know I will stand before God one day to account for how I measured up to that expectation. I don't ever want to let Him down and am humbled by the trust He puts in me.

So for all the rest of you fathers out there, keep trying. Keep pointing them to the perfect example: Jesus Christ. If we can succeed at that, we will have accomplished most of our job. Instead of wallowing in guilt on a day like this, let's recommit to be better as we worship and become more like our Heavenly Father.

In His Service,
CH John Critchfield